Frank’s soapbox #1 (he’s lost it this time)


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Friday, August 14, 2009


The new Archie sucks. And the people who publish Archie have got to be mentally challenged. I mean, c’mon, Archie married Veronica? Archie would never marry Veronica! He’d, of course, marry Betty. And, of course, Veronica would marry Reggie. (Archie’s own creator, John L. Goldwater, said as much, and if I can find the quote, I’ll add it here later.) And now, Archie and Veronica are having twins? What?

And I haven’t even mentioned the “dynamic new look” drawing style it’s all drawn in. Archie Comics has one of the most recognizable house styles in existence and they choose to go “realistic?” That’s just retarded. I’m sure they sold a few extra thousand copies and they are a happy little corporation because of it, but to fans of the franchise this is just the last straw.

With all the reprints being issued in recent years, one would think the geniuses over at Archie would publish The Collected Archie Comics of Harry Lucey or collect all of Dan DeCarlo’s Archie comics, but no, the closest thing we get is Best of the Sixties, which has at least some classics. (And yet they still do not credit the artists, can you believe it?!) The publishers are sitting on a goldmine and they don’t even know it. There are literally hundreds of Archie issues with awesome art by the likes of Lucey and DeCarlo, but unless you’re willing to track down the original issues, or dig through the reprints, you are shit out of luck.

UPDATE 8/15: I must’ve been on a particular wavelength because a story about Archie appeared over the AP wire this morning. It makes me think that the whole story arc about the marriage will turn out to be a dream sequence. The article notes that after the six issue arc “the gang returns to high school.” Oy vey.

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26 Responses to “Frank’s soapbox #1 (he’s lost it this time)”
  1. Tom Spurgeon says:

    Artistic credit is okay and everything, but I want to know which of the realistic Riverside girls was the first to have sex with Apollo Ohno there.

  2. Evan says:

    I think Dark Horse recently announced they're publishing Archie comic collections in the near future. But yeah, this stuff looks awful and seems wrongheaded. Not that you or I or anyone we know were buying the "classic" version Archie comics that were coming out — and I believe, are still coming out, there are like Archie "universes" or "brands" now.

  3. Frank Santoro says:

    Oh, great, another 50 dollar collection from Dark Horde (sic).

  4. Anonymous says:

    Picturebox's mouthpiece is criticizing another publisher's pricing?

  5. T. Hodler says:

    Touché. Just for the record (& I understand why some won't believe me), Comics Comics isn't really the PictureBox mouthpiece. The PictureBox website is. Dan doesn't necessarily approve of or agree with anything written by the rest of us. And vice versa, for that matter.

  6. Jacob Covey says:

    Yeah, right. And I'm not a puppet for The Comics Journal, Hodler.

  7. Frank Santoro says:

    Evan: "I think Dark Horse recently announced they're publishing Archie comic collections in the near future. "

    Frank: "Oh, great, another 50 dollar collection from Dark Horde (sic)."

    Anonymous: "Picturebox's mouthpiece is criticizing another publisher's pricing?"

    Frank: "That you Mr. Richardson? How's it hangin'?! I got a great idea for a new mini-series! Gimme a shout anytime."

  8. blaise larmee says:

    Tom Spurgeon – is that a half Japanese joke you're making? Regardless, if Archie Comics really wanted to connect to contemporary American youth they would have made straight up OEL manga.

  9. Tom Spurgeon says:

    Ohno and Howie Mandel are the only people I know with soul patches, and Howie's bald.

  10. Frank Santoro says:

    I had to look him up on Google. You guys must watch a lot of TV.

    Anyways, Harry Lucey is awesome. Check him out.

  11. blaise larmee says:

    tom: ah! it's just that my grandma adores him and i can't bear to see his name disgraced.
    frank: he was on the wheaties box at one point!

  12. Ryan Kirk says:

    Both Dark Horse and IDW have announced they'll be doing Archie reprints.

    Dark Horse will be publishing a chronological reprinting starting from the beginning. I've seen the project described as Archives and/or Omnibuses. Either way, a chronological reprinting does interest me much.

    IDW, will be reprinting the Archie comic strip by Bob Montana under the Library of American Comics. But of more interest to me is they will be doing artist themed "Best of" collections. DeCarlo, Montana, and Goldberg were mentioned in the story I saw. Plus some story themed collections edited by Craig Yoe. I'll definitely pick up the artist-centric books, and take a look at the other IDW stuff.

  13. Frank Santoro says:

    thanks Ryan.

  14. Benjamin Marra says:

    Call me crazy, but I like the new, "realistic" art style Archie is drawn in. I'm going to start buying it because of that. I agree with everything else though, Frank. They need to publish a collected DeCarlo book. And, yeah, Archie would've married Betty and Veronica would've married Jughead. But isn't it weirder that it didn't turn out like we thought?

  15. Frank Santoro says:

    If Archie cheats on his new wife Veronica and sleeps with Betty, I'll be satisfied. But, it's gotta by drawn in graphic "realistic" detail.

  16. Benjamin Marra says:

    I'd read that comic.

  17. Sam Gas Can says:

    One thing I've always appreciated about Archie comics is just how fucked they are, the fact that they continue to do the most audacious things imaginable, so I say "why not". Let Archie marry Veronica, let Betty become distraught and steal their babies, let Jughead come out of the closet, and let Reggie die in Iraq. The crazier the better.

  18. afdumin says:

    Well, for now there's always the more affordable though less than stellar Archie Americana Series of trade paperbacks collecting "best of" stories from the forties to the nineties.

    http://archiecomics.stores.yahoo.net/graphicnovels.html
    (scroll down to the bottom of the page to see what I'm talking about)

  19. Inkstuds says:

    Wow, i really don't care about archie. how about writing about Batman!

  20. Anonymous says:

    Jeez – you Americans get all 'culture wars' when it comes to your heritage of junk! Who cares what they've done with Archie and Jughead in the past thirty years? The one comic who's parodies had more value. I wasn't even aware the company still existed!

  21. Frank Santoro says:

    oh shut up.

  22. Torsten Adair says:

    Okay… nobody noticed this at NYCC '09 but me…

    Archie Comics had a big display of Archie 600 – 605. #600 – 602 is an "imaginary story" where Archie marries Veronica. #603 – 605, Archie does the same with Betty. You are correct… it's all a dream, but pretty cool in that Archie marries both Betty and Veronica!

    It will all be drawn in the usual Archie style, as Archie Comics magazine has never printed any New Look comics.

    The New Look stories are four-part stories published in the digests. If you don't like them, you can flip past them and read the numerous reprints of Li'l Jinx, That Wilkins Boy, and Little Archie. Archie comics is collecting these mini-series into graphic novels, hoping to relaunch their graphic novel catalog.

    The "fans of the franchise" (the kids who buy the comics from newsstands) liked the first series (published in 2007!), so Archie Comics published more in that style. Yes, some older fans didn't like it, but 1) that's not the market Archie is worried about, and 2) there's lots of other titles from Archie comics which feeds the nostalgic fans.

    So… Frank… does this mean you don't approve of experimentation in comics? You want the same-old-same-old Superman and Batman and Spider-Man? Lois Lane trying to discover Superman's secret identity and Superman making her look foolish? The Joker trying to pull off some wacky scheme involving giant props, and Batman ending the story with a bad pun? (Nothing wrong with that…)

  23. Frank Santoro says:

    I'm warming up to it, haha. I wish Benjamin Marra was drawing it tho.

  24. Torsten Adair says:

    Hmmm… what with Wednesday Comics and Marvel's Strange Tales, maybe it would be interesting to see how "regular" cartoonists would interpret Archie and the Gang.

    Right… we'll see that a month before Archie announces the Archie/Cherry/Dee Dee crossover…

  25. Leigh Walton says:

    Thanks, Torsten.

    Everybody getting up in arms about this is like the people posting comments on the USA TODAY web site saying "I can't believe they killed Captain America I mean what does that say about our countrey by the way I have some very valuable X-Men comics for sale in my basement."

    Come on, we're supposed to know better.

    I'm with you on the need for a DeCarlo book, though.

  26. Andrew Lorenzi says:

    I've been wanting a Harry Lucey collection since reading Jaime Hernandez speak so highly of him. I guess I'll go with Archie in the 60s for now.

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